Thoughts dating your best friend

THE FACTORS THAT SHOULD BE IN PLAY BEFORE YOU START DATING YOUR BEST FRIEND 1) A mutual (and intense) desire--ON BOTH SIDES--to give it a whirl.2) The LACK of some major precipitating event.

Plus, he's very tall and quite handsome--an indubitably attractive guy (whom the ladies generally love).

At the same time, after considering it for a minute or two, I realized that if I give it a try, my reluctance could create a weird dynamic which could very well do serious damage to the friendship--maybe as much as a failed romance would. --because there doesn't seem to be much else to explain it.

I also wondered if my hesitation had to do with a (lingering? Yet, the lack of sexual heat was an indisputable fact.

) case of commitment-phobia on my part, rather than any real doubts about the situation at hand; maybe the supposed chemistry conundrum was just a cover for my fear of getting closer to him. (Trust me on that: About six months after we broke up, Jake said, "The sex really wasn't very good, was it?

And so I decided that the very best thing I could do was to give it a shot and see what happened--in part because I also felt fairly confident, upon reflection, that my friendship with Jake was strong enough to survive just about anything. " And indeed, it was not.) Still, the break-up--understandable and inevitable though it was--hurt. After all, if I couldn't make it work with this person I cared so deeply about, and got along so well with, how in the hell was I ever going to make thing work?

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