Validating statements

To confirm or strengthen what is relevant, true, or effective about a response, be it a thought, emotion, physical sensation, or action.

Validation requires empathy (the accurate understanding of the person’s experience) but validation also includes the communication that the person’s response makes sense.

I said how about you make a rhubarb crumble I can cut you some? If she had come down the path and I’d said oh you can go on a bike ride another day, listen big girls don’t cry (invalidation) I know she would have become really upset more than likely run down the path into the house slamming doors and more importantly I wouldn’t have got a rhubarb crumble!!

She said ok and after a few tears off she went into the house and baked a delicious rhubarb crumble. But seriously this is what happens in life particularly with those who seek help for self harm.

(Linehan) From Karyn Hall’s NEABPD call in 2011 Some of the things validation helps with are communication, building trust, it can help lessen the distress for someone and shows you just get it.

Invalidation causes the person to get more upset and this happens to many people who self harm and attend A&E or by other Health Care Professionals not taking people seriously or family and friends.

The painful part was the grey area between researching as a group with your classmates versus “cheating” – too many shared sources looked like you didn’t do your own homework, even though learning and researching as a pair is far more effective than doing it alone.

The flip side of that is the grey area between what you need to cite in the first place – when I combine my philosophy and MBA background with Austin Kleon and Ash Maurya to produce an idea that is fairly unique to me – what do attribute I and when?

It takes so much time to properly cite things in double-spaced New Times Roman MLA format that I went ahead and restricted the number of sources to compensate – hardly what my teacher intended!

Suddenly I heard the car pull in and I thought hmm what’s happened here?

My daughter appeared on the path her chin wobbling looking really upset. She replied that her chain had broken on her bike and she didn’t get to go on the bike ride ..

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