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I don't know." Us: "It's properly random." Sam: "Yeah. Talk then turns to food, as Frankie tells us all about a recent meal out. I just literally got up, got my d**k out, and started w**king all over the burger." He actually stands up at this point and imitates this. Frankie then relays a story of how he got barred from a club for pissing himself in the corner. What we discovered: Table manners are not Frankie's forte. Inexplicably, one of the first topics of conversation that comes up is how he visited a Harvester last week, and he enjoys telling us how he had chicken wings to start followed by a mixed grill with salad bar and a chocolate fudge brownie to finish. Dan, who's drinking water owing to having to drive to Cardiff in the morning for a money-making personal appearance, also reveals that mate Sam Faiers's quietness in the Celebrity Big Brother house has "done her a favour", and when it comes to reality TV he's willing to "try a bit of anything". "What we discovered: If Dan were to wine and dine us for real, we would end up in a low-budget restaurant chain. We leave the table unsure of whether we really fancy him or if we should report him to Sussex Police. Overall: 8/10Dan Osborne (off of , and he reveals that his "arse is bruised" from training.
" Once we have explained to him what the word 'feud' means, he answers: "Not really." Great. What we discovered: Sam has a younger, more attractive, famous and incredibly talented girlfriend. But when we get to Arg, we see that he's taking this proper seriously.
Undeterred, we plough on with the date, but conversation doesn't come easily. Instead, he says: "How often do you get to go on a boat? However, the date flies by, as we discover that we go to all of the same bars and clubs. We inform him that women are attracted to young, single dads. Some people are seeing it like a real date, others like an interview." Us: "This is whatever you want it to beâ€¦" Dan: *pauses* "Right..."Overall: 6/10James 'Diags' Bennewith (off of Before we've even sat down opposite Diags, he kisses us on the cheek and asks what our name is. I just poured my last drink over the table," he says, obviously taking date tips from Frankie. "When you've had a few drinks, you get on with anyone." We try not to be offended. He then asks us if we're going on to a club afterwards.
So we have to resort to delving into a top hat on the table which has been filled with questions. He then orders a vodka, soda and lime and tells us that he's had "four or five" of Foxy's 'Love Potions' - an alcoholic orange nonsense that is being handed out in test tubes. Conversation is flowing as freely as the booze, and we even seem to have a few things in common, including the fact that we both went to V Festival last year."I was in the VIP bit and they chucked me out," he exclaims. " We then mention we're from Digital Spy, and Diags launches into a drunken slurry ramble about seeing DS on Twitter, in the cornerâ€¦ or something. We didn't twig that this might have been him asking us out, and now we'll never know what might have beenâ€¦What we discovered: If we were hoping to gain access to an exclusive London club, Diags probably isn't the guy to go on a date with. Overall: 9/10James 'Arg' Argent (off of At the start of the evening, everyone was given a score sheet to rate all of the dates.
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."But that's exactly what Sam decides to say to Digital Spy. It's a good night."Overall: 3/10Frankie Cocozza (off of It's relatively early on in the evening, but already Frankie is paralytic drunk. " is his opening gambit, and as we're seduced by his hair and Fred Perry shirt, we're presuming this is leading to a nice chat-up line. " This pretty much sets the tone for the next eight minutes. We then ask what else he likes doing in his spare time. If we went out for a romantic meal with him, we would check whether that really was mayonnaise on our plateâ€¦Most awkward moment: When he spilled his drink. Asked when he last cried, he melts our heart by saying it was when his son Teddy was born a month ago. Most awkward moment: Dan: "I'm confused as to what's going on.